The Big Girl’s Guide to Making Friends
How to win friends and influence people – a child’s guide to a grown-up dilemna
She and I likened it to herpes, a sort of “social gonorrhoea” if you will. Whilst many people suffer from it, nobody wants to talk about it in public. Loneliness and isolation don’t discriminate. People of all ages, genders and social statuses are affected. Introverts and extroverts, single people, married people, young and old alike can all feel the soul sting of loneliness. Working from home as I do, there have been days where I have longed for the casual, affable social interactions that I used to take for granted in the office. Whilst I love the flexibility that working from home affords, there is no question that sometimes I feel cut-off.
1. Feel the fear and do it anyway
2. First impressions don’t have to count
I always get the impression that people think that I am intimidating or aggressive upon first meeting. I am quite tall for a lady and not slight in stature. My voice skims the tenor/bass range in pitch and is not dissimilar to a mid ’90’s boom box in volume. I get it, I am noticeable. It used to bother me but now I have decided that IDGAF*. Do you know why? Because it’s not the first impression that counts. It’s every impression after that matters more. If you mess up the first time you meet someone, don’t write off your chances of making friends. Just pick yourself up, dust yourself off and try again. Similarly, if someone you meet doesn’t give you the best impression at first, give them a second chance, and a third. They could well be just as nervous as you are!
3. Look for the common ground
5. Be open and honest
6. If the mountain won’t come to Mohammed…
*Pardon my French!
After experiencing three separate bereavements in the family, I learnt how to overcome the lasting effects of my low moods and anxieties, and to get back into the world! I learnt that all the resilience I need to survive is already in me, and that it is my responsibility to make myself happy.